I will kill my boyfriend before 31st night

Hello Dr. Mama Zimbi, my name is Angela and I am 24yrs old. I have been in a relationship with my guy for 3 years now and I love him. Mama, my guy wants to fool with me I have sworn to kill him before 31st night if you don’t advice me. Mama, he has impregnated me 4 times before June and in all he begged me to abort them swearing with the Bible that he was going to marry me by the end of this year. He asked me to go for the list 3 months ago when I was again pregnant and I did. He told begged me again to abort it because it will not be nice for me to be pregnant during our wedding, and he gave me a drug and I took.

Mama, up till now he doesn’t talk about marriage again. Mama, is this fair? Since Monday, he has refused to pick my calls. What hurts me is that I have developed an infection in my womb due to the abortions and I am treating it. Mama, which man will love me in my situation? What if I don’t give birth in future? I’m dying inside me and I will not die alone. Mama, evil is running through my mind and I will not forgive him. He will not see next year. Oh God, I am hurting…Please advice me.